Chaos surrounds my world. Things are forever changing and challenging me. They are changing my perspective. See, normally, I would be feeling chaotic, overwhelmed, even. I do not need to be afraid. I know who I am, belonging to the Creator of the universe, bought for a price by Jesus Christ’s sacrifice.
I cannot really explain the peace I feel- I know it comes from God. I know I’ve been intentional about my time with God as of late, and really working on my commitment and dedication to it. I also offer myself grace, as God has shown me grace on so, so many occasions. If the Omniscient, amazing God can show me grace, then of course I can show grace to myself, and I hope you can offer it to yourself as well.
I’ve got joy that makes no sense, and a peace that I cannot explain. Only God knows. I suppose I could try. Here goes.
God has blessed my life abundantly, time and time again. He has not ever forsaken me. He has shown up every single time I’ve asked. Sometimes in ways that I didn’t understand at the time, but always in a way that worked for His good and in turn, worked for mine. He has also shown up in obvious ways.
I remember the time at Christmas, it was a hard year. And an even harder month. Financially, we had taken hit after hit. We just could not get ahead, and could not see a light at the end of the tunnel. So, I prayed. I cried out to God, and I pleaded. Something along the lines of “God, you are a God of miracles. I believe your word, when you say ask, and it should be given to you. Please, God, provide and make a way when there is no way.”
Back to my office, I returned. Still, in desperation, I wished to pray without ceasing. “God, please provide!” I cried out. In that exact moment, “ding,” I heard an e-mail pop up. It was from HR, explaining I was to be given a raise, a retroactive raise. It was enough to provide for all of our needs in that moment. Praise You, Jesus, I sighed a sigh of relief, and lifted a prayer of gratitude to my Father in Heaven.
So when I say, chaos surrounds me, I do not mean I do not know it is there. I do not mean I am ignoring it. I am simply saying my God is my Jireh, Provider, Alpha, and Omega. I have joy, that makes no sense. When others find things overwhelming, my immediate response is- God. Go to God. Because He can make a way where there is no way.
I have joy that makes no sense. Or maybe- it makes some sense, after all, I know where my joy comes from. The joy of the Lord lives in me.
Mandi C.
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